Chrystal heart, jar of clay

I just wanted, no needed to blog a blog of praise (yes I just coined that phrase, corny as it is) I’ve been reading a book I read years ago, (back when I was still Miss Bresler and not Mrs. Wessels) I am enjoying it thoroughly, so much so that it has opened up in me a thankfulness and sense of awe for my mighty God. Yes I love a mighty God, why? It is so simple, yet it is the truth that has brought about this huge change in me, I love Him because He loves me. Oh my soul, sing!

This morning I couldn’t contain myself and my love overflowed into songs of praise of which the words were holy and cannot be understood. I am so thankful for this Love, It has truly driven out the fear in my heart. The fear of losing my mind again, of ending up in hospital, of having to start all over again. I know now that this beautiful chrystal ornament of a heart in my hands is a gift from my Beloved. It is mine to protect and to cherish and envelop in love. I also know that if it should fall and shatter into a million pieces, not one piece will be lost, but all will be caught in His big hands. It is in fact not me supporting this precious heart but Him. His hands are holding my hands. If this heart should break again, if the bipolar comes rushing in again and sweeps like a torrent over me, I will probably suffer, but I will not be destroyed. I don’t fear it anymore, not because I think it won’t show up again, but because I have discovered a Charlotte that is resilient, founded in truth and in possession of a deep river of joy. Joy that comes from knowing. Knowing that I’m loved and accepted. No matter what happens here in this world, I am being prepared for a greater glory.

2Co 4:7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.
2Co 4:8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair;
2Co 4:9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;
2Co 4:10 always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.

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